20100823
0727
okay so i have been trying t figure out hw t close e gap btw e date and e post title together, but i still cant. i am so annoyed w e spaces. ARGGGG
20100618
get a life.
im going crazy because i cant believe i, no, we have to deal with your adolescence nonsense about breakups and your almost fucked up relationship. stop telling me "do you know how i feel? you dunno how i feel. do you know i am very depressed? you dunno what happened." i dun even know how many times you have to god damn it repeat those sentences, and they are fucking hurting my ears now. yes, it's okay to be depressed and take advantage of the situation for awhile, but not forever. Using other people's money to clean up your own mess is really bullshit. ive been through the worst, and yours is totally nothing. i dun get why youre still fussing over it.
the worst kind of people t have is to find trouble and cause unneccessary inconvenience to people yet still having the face to argue back when the situation is not how they want it to be. like how the fuck could you bring yourself to do it?
FUCKED UP USELESS. SPOILT BRAT
the worst kind of people t have is to find trouble and cause unneccessary inconvenience to people yet still having the face to argue back when the situation is not how they want it to be. like how the fuck could you bring yourself to do it?
FUCKED UP USELESS. SPOILT BRAT
20100608
when you dont expect
"only for tonight, only for tonight."
though it always happened on the most random night, though it only happens once in a blue moon. all these uncalled for nights were the best.
though it always happened on the most random night, though it only happens once in a blue moon. all these uncalled for nights were the best.
0547
sitting on the pathetic tiny tool. a can of coke. the tv switched to some taiwan styling show. just uploaded some pictures. painted my nails, FINALLY IN GREY. finished eating korean cold noodles and surprised why owyong is up so early tweeting and asking about the fight. thinking of where to go later, and what i have to do.
i recieved alot of red packets yesterday even though i barely knew what i did and why im getting them. they said it was for the open door ceremony during the wedding. but anyhow, it's still money!
i cant stop thinking about having chillicrabs and mantou, even though i just had it about 1 week ago. i need to go to the temple later. do you think the gods will listen to your prayers and make them come true? i really hope so.
while my life have always been like a drama, my friends' life like an action movie.
it's going 6am, im not asleep. im wide awake and it annoys me. so should i walk over to mac's for breakies? it sucks to be the one that stays in the west. seems so lonely. urg. >:(
i recieved alot of red packets yesterday even though i barely knew what i did and why im getting them. they said it was for the open door ceremony during the wedding. but anyhow, it's still money!
i cant stop thinking about having chillicrabs and mantou, even though i just had it about 1 week ago. i need to go to the temple later. do you think the gods will listen to your prayers and make them come true? i really hope so.
while my life have always been like a drama, my friends' life like an action movie.
it's going 6am, im not asleep. im wide awake and it annoys me. so should i walk over to mac's for breakies? it sucks to be the one that stays in the west. seems so lonely. urg. >:(
MAY-JUNE
preview of the month of may. way too many to upload, so i picked few out of the lot.
BKK! i love BKK!
@bkk's airport!
alex's newly wedded wife! BIBI.
thai traditional wedding ceremony.
7 bottles down in less than an hour, and obviously those who drank crazily were drunk and down.
the both of them in the pict didnt even realised we left them in the hotel room without aircon and lights.
ww after the wedding dinner, still eating at the hotel's foodstall. boy, he finished all by himself pls.
dom's finger after tripping and smashing the bottle onto himself.
cousin's wedding.
late night macs with mocha, wensheng and gang.
birthday treat @kuishinbo from erasmus!
birthday @soho.
birthday dinner @jumbo dempsey.
we didnt plan to meet, we just happened to see each other at nana. like what owyong said: "nana my second home." that's for everyone of them.
loverboy treated me to 2 trays of apple shooters, was supposed to be 3, but luckily for me he knew i couldnt drink anymore apple shooters. the thought of apple shooters still make me wanna puke. + all the other misc drinks. the very next day i totally can puke in anyone's faces.
to sum it up, for the month of may it was filled with so much dramas(as usual), ups and downs, happiness, angst and disappointments, but well-lived.
BKK! i love BKK!
@bkk's airport!
alex's newly wedded wife! BIBI.
thai traditional wedding ceremony.
7 bottles down in less than an hour, and obviously those who drank crazily were drunk and down.the both of them in the pict didnt even realised we left them in the hotel room without aircon and lights.
ww after the wedding dinner, still eating at the hotel's foodstall. boy, he finished all by himself pls.
dom's finger after tripping and smashing the bottle onto himself.
cousin's wedding.
late night macs with mocha, wensheng and gang.
birthday treat @kuishinbo from erasmus!
birthday @soho.
birthday dinner @jumbo dempsey.
we didnt plan to meet, we just happened to see each other at nana. like what owyong said: "nana my second home." that's for everyone of them.
loverboy treated me to 2 trays of apple shooters, was supposed to be 3, but luckily for me he knew i couldnt drink anymore apple shooters. the thought of apple shooters still make me wanna puke. + all the other misc drinks. the very next day i totally can puke in anyone's faces.
to sum it up, for the month of may it was filled with so much dramas(as usual), ups and downs, happiness, angst and disappointments, but well-lived.
you cant be that real girl.
fuck you and your aging allies. i was doing it for someone who meant something to me, and not for you. i hope your boobs burst and you break your nose. if i have the choice, i wouldnt even be there. i actually feel glad i decided to flare up in the damn car yesterday, because you totally deserved it even though i was being a bitch with major attitude problem. at least i was better than you, better than trying to shove responsibilites trying to speak like there was a 3rd person, trying to act like you werent the one who started all that pin pointing stuffs.
so much animosity,so much pretense. nice try for saying i have nice hair colour, nice complexion, nice lashes and nice heels, thanks but no thanks. save it.
youre just weird, and not human.
ps: so sorry your big butts have to squeeze in the super pathetic car, go get yourself a bmw if you are so unhappy about it, or just suck it up because there were only so few cars. shut up and go eat your bananas. i was just down on my luck that i have to know you, which i dont even wish so yes, i dont owe you a living.
a bunch of fools.
so much animosity,so much pretense. nice try for saying i have nice hair colour, nice complexion, nice lashes and nice heels, thanks but no thanks. save it.
youre just weird, and not human.
ps: so sorry your big butts have to squeeze in the super pathetic car, go get yourself a bmw if you are so unhappy about it, or just suck it up because there were only so few cars. shut up and go eat your bananas. i was just down on my luck that i have to know you, which i dont even wish so yes, i dont owe you a living.
a bunch of fools.
20100523
thrashbox or gembox?
dont like talking to you yet i always talk to you. it's like hearing myself 10thousand years ago, again. it's like you are becoming like me, liking whatever i like only that you took longer to find that something i found years ago.
im sucha walking contradiction.
im sucha walking contradiction.
AYLA
im perspiring in this trying-very-hard-to-be-cold-room, its raining horses and cows outside, temperature in the room dropped and its a little colder. im using my laptop while lying on the bed, even though i know its gonna make me feel warmer.
the boys are finally sleeping soundly after the 3 days of playing, and talking nonsense, singing, youtubing during bedtime. im glad, but just when i finally get to sleep, i cant seem to fall asleep. im tired.
im only here, wherever i am in now for a good reason, that's for my friends's wedding. CONGRATULATIONS.
i really cant seem to sleep, lying around listening to their snoring voices, tossing and turning, watching shows, listening to ayla. still feeling so warm in here. they dont have clarityne here, and im dying of all the rashes im getting! the pills i bought here claims to stop itch and rash, but fucking hell it's not helping. god save me man.
my thai friend is so funny, he has to record whatever he wants to say to me and send it via bbm. same goes for bibi, her friend recorded and said this: i think i talk easier. who could have thought of that? okay i know i know i know i wouldnt thought of that.
curfew 3rd day, thank god thank god thank god, we dont have it on sunday! btw i haven told you that this place is just like raccoon city, only without zombies, its quite fascinating to see a deadtown literally, with no one, that kinda place that is good for playing l4d LIVE. and also fascinating to see so many military police and army around, carrying guns that i have never seen before ever. its civil war,but it's cool and peaceful. we just dont get it here, we cant see shit only hear and read from the news. it's as good as nothing happened.
ive gotta wake at 7am later, and now it's 3am thai time. how great, maybe i should turn in now. goodbye.
the boys are finally sleeping soundly after the 3 days of playing, and talking nonsense, singing, youtubing during bedtime. im glad, but just when i finally get to sleep, i cant seem to fall asleep. im tired.
im only here, wherever i am in now for a good reason, that's for my friends's wedding. CONGRATULATIONS.
i really cant seem to sleep, lying around listening to their snoring voices, tossing and turning, watching shows, listening to ayla. still feeling so warm in here. they dont have clarityne here, and im dying of all the rashes im getting! the pills i bought here claims to stop itch and rash, but fucking hell it's not helping. god save me man.
my thai friend is so funny, he has to record whatever he wants to say to me and send it via bbm. same goes for bibi, her friend recorded and said this: i think i talk easier. who could have thought of that? okay i know i know i know i wouldnt thought of that.
curfew 3rd day, thank god thank god thank god, we dont have it on sunday! btw i haven told you that this place is just like raccoon city, only without zombies, its quite fascinating to see a deadtown literally, with no one, that kinda place that is good for playing l4d LIVE. and also fascinating to see so many military police and army around, carrying guns that i have never seen before ever. its civil war,but it's cool and peaceful. we just dont get it here, we cant see shit only hear and read from the news. it's as good as nothing happened.
ive gotta wake at 7am later, and now it's 3am thai time. how great, maybe i should turn in now. goodbye.
20100510
bestfriend
you have any idea about the kind of magical friendship you have with your bff? fucking love hate. she asked us out after a long long long long time. and of cos, needless to say it's because she was busy with (WORK, BOYFRIEND, WORK AND BOYFRIEND) mind you, she works with her bf, and almost 90% of the time she stays with him and have breakfast lunch and dinner together. and also because her bf was in kl for a work trip! i wonder how is that awesome to her? most of the time i feel like killing her with the parang, but that isnt a choice because she's still my bff. still love her till bits, and of cos not forgetting the funniest girl on earth lurvies chia. the both of them really know how to test my patience level.
dread.
i was thinking, when will i ever, ever, ever get myself to bed before i realised it's time for work. all the back to back jobs are driving me crazy, but i'm so glad it's gonna be over soon(at least for the month of may). my schedules are packed mad, and because i love myself too much i actually told myself not to work for the month of may, and it's supposed to stop before may actually starts yet i'm still at it. my boss really didnt think much about how serious i was saying that i need to stop working for the month of may. heh. i really need to talk about it tmr, because im serious(im like 10 days behind schedule, im supposed to start planning for everything that's coming). the upcoming friend's wedding overseas that almost made me lose my patience and yes, my 21st! i really wish i can drop everything on hands, book a ticket and fly to japan to look for the boys. and great, it's 630am i just got home from the airport and i have to report work at 10am. freaking awesome.
20100413
20100330
mona lisa?
i know, i have always know that there will always be people being melissa to me. and because of one incident, i refused to think that girls are the innocent ones. girls are whorifying, and it scares me sometimes knowing that. bestfriend, goodfriends, closefriends, friends, strangers whatever it is, only human. how can i forget that every man is for themselves? i'm sorry i never forgot what happened. i cant believe i actually fell for it, i cant believe i actually believed it. i guess im the only one that will ever buy it. and that's for putting in too much trust.
i'm saying that there isnt one person that we can believe in wholeheartedly anymore. now even what we see isnt what we get. what we believe in might just be make-believe, who knows. they just dont turn out to be what we thought it should be. it's those tiny little details that passed you by, that plays the most crucial part of getting to know someone, and yet you just get so caught up with something else. though it's a whole different situation altogether, it really reminds me of what happened aeons ago. bad trauma. haha.
but it's still kinda annoying to know that people really think im that dumb to try hiding yet speaking the truth. the next minute the truth will be out, dont speak like youre the hero, yet secretly letting other people take the blame. you cant stop people from saying what they wanna say, and when they say it youre just doomed. that's for lying and not doing it the way it should be. i did open up to listen, to maybe give a benefit of the doubt. but now i wont even, because i know at the end of the day it will still be a pack of lies. right from the start it was a lie, till the end it will still be. give me a chance not to think that way? i doubt so.
***and guess what, i was right. it's so easy to put pieces of things together to form a puzzle, and there you go, you get the answer. just when i thought i could just leave it alone, and pretend nothing happened.
when will people ever be truthful to themselves, to the people around them and stop making things up? next time when you wanna let someone in, wanna get to know people better, at least do some background check. it will be safer that way.
theres always a reason why friends are friends and why friends arent friends anymore, because birds of the same feathers always flock together, and when youre different, no matter how hard you try, you will never be the same. dont even try.
i dont wish to believe whatever that is, but seriously? i had enough of people trying to dupe me, i dont wanna dupe myself further.
i'm saying that there isnt one person that we can believe in wholeheartedly anymore. now even what we see isnt what we get. what we believe in might just be make-believe, who knows. they just dont turn out to be what we thought it should be. it's those tiny little details that passed you by, that plays the most crucial part of getting to know someone, and yet you just get so caught up with something else. though it's a whole different situation altogether, it really reminds me of what happened aeons ago. bad trauma. haha.
but it's still kinda annoying to know that people really think im that dumb to try hiding yet speaking the truth. the next minute the truth will be out, dont speak like youre the hero, yet secretly letting other people take the blame. you cant stop people from saying what they wanna say, and when they say it youre just doomed. that's for lying and not doing it the way it should be. i did open up to listen, to maybe give a benefit of the doubt. but now i wont even, because i know at the end of the day it will still be a pack of lies. right from the start it was a lie, till the end it will still be. give me a chance not to think that way? i doubt so.
***and guess what, i was right. it's so easy to put pieces of things together to form a puzzle, and there you go, you get the answer. just when i thought i could just leave it alone, and pretend nothing happened.
when will people ever be truthful to themselves, to the people around them and stop making things up? next time when you wanna let someone in, wanna get to know people better, at least do some background check. it will be safer that way.
theres always a reason why friends are friends and why friends arent friends anymore, because birds of the same feathers always flock together, and when youre different, no matter how hard you try, you will never be the same. dont even try.
i dont wish to believe whatever that is, but seriously? i had enough of people trying to dupe me, i dont wanna dupe myself further.
welcome to the real world
it's okay for yourself to lose faith, but it's really sad when you see your friends losing faith too, falling into that same pithole as you do and yet there's nothing you can do to stop. you know life is hard, but the question will always remain the same. is life really that hard? you just refused to think that there are many people out there that feels the way you feel, especially the people around you. the things that life put you through, the series of heartbreaks and disappointments; the only-normal games of nature and a part of life, a vicious cycle that we have to face, yet no one ever get used to. and so who will be the one to tell you, life isnt that hard afterall? who and what can we believe in? issit true that the good and the nice always finish last?
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